Lesson 31: Practice of Control and Letting Go
Duration:70 minutes
Topic Introduction:The desire to control everything often stems from inner anxiety. You can draw three circles with AI: what I can control, what I can influence, and what I can only accept. Putting things back where they belong will ease the tension in your heart. Letting go isn't about indifference, but about acknowledging the limitations of human strength and reserving your energy for what you can truly do today. You can write down a small part of what you're letting go of, like putting a heavy bag on the ground for a moment. Get your breathing back. Give yourself some time.
○ Course Topic Audio
Lesson 31: Practice of Control and Letting Go
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This lesson's theme is "Will I be anxious for the rest of my life? — Reconstructing the Self-Narrative for Those with Chronic Anxiety." The focus of courses related to generalized anxiety is not to immediately eliminate anxiety, but to first understand how anxiety forms a cycle in thoughts, body, and life rhythms. Reconstructing the self-narrative of those with chronic anxiety involves changing "I am an anxious person" to "I am learning to live with tension." When anxiety persists, the brain tends to seek danger, and the body preemptively goes into defense; breathing, stomach, neck and shoulders, sleep, and attention can all be affected. You may know that something hasn't happened yet, but you're already mentally rehearsing the worst outcome; you may want to relax, but find that your body simply won't cooperate. The first step in this lesson is to remove anxiety from the self-evaluation of "I can't do it" and replace it with "My system is sounding the alarm." This change is crucial because only once you stop attacking yourself can you begin to adjust. You can start by writing down your most prominent worry of the day, and then ask yourself: Is it a real problem, or a disaster rehearsal? Does it need immediate attention, or does it simply need to be recorded? The second step is to bring your body back to the present moment. Try exhaling slowly, feeling your feet touch the ground, and gently relax your jaw, shoulders, and fingers. If your emotions are still high, don't rush to convince yourself it's okay; just send a signal to your body: I know you're tense, let's slow down. For anxiety, safety isn't just a slogan, but a series of small, repeatable actions. The third step is to choose a minimal action. It could be drinking water, eating something, opening a window, writing three sentences, pausing for five minutes, tidying a corner, or contacting someone you trust. The significance of minimal actions isn't to immediately solve life's problems, but to allow the brain to re-experience: I'm not completely out of control; I can still influence reality a little. If you experience intense panic, persistent insomnia, self-harming thoughts, or an inability to stabilize yourself during the exercise, don't suffer alone; contact family, doctors, therapists, or local emergency help resources immediately. The course content is suitable for learning and self-reflection, but cannot replace professional diagnosis and treatment. Finally, give yourself a reassuring reminder: Anxiety doesn't mean I've failed; it's just a signal reminding me to slow down, observe, and take care of myself. Today, simply identifying a trigger point, completing a small action, or writing down a thought is already a step forward on the road to recovery. After reading aloud, jot down three phrases: What am I worried about right now? Where in my body is the tension greatest? What step am I willing to take first? Save these three phrases; the next time anxiety arises, they will help you return to an actionable path more quickly. Don't strive for complete calm after just one practice session; stability comes from repetition, gentleness, and sustainability. You are not learning to destroy yourself, but to interact with your nervous system in a safer way. After reading aloud, jot down three phrases: What am I worried about right now? Where in my body is the tension greatest? What step am I willing to take first?
AI Healing Q&A
A sense of control can be reassuring, but trying to grasp everything can be exhausting. You can tell an AI what you can't let go of. It will categorize it into three types: controllable, influencing, and what you can only wait for. This isn't about giving up, but about focusing your energy on what's truly important. For the rest, practice loosening your grip a little, giving yourself some space. Loosening your grip isn't about giving up, but about reserving your energy for what's truly important. Put yourself back in the middle. Take it slow.
○ Music therapy guidance
When you feel too much control, your body often feels like it's constantly clenching a fist. Please choose a piece of music with pauses or breaks in the flow. When you hear these pauses, practice loosening your grip and relaxing your jaw. Letting go isn't irresponsible; it's acknowledging that some things can't be determined through repeated force. Letting go of just one small thing today is already practicing a new sense of security. After listening, choose a place where you won't be constantly checking things out today, and give yourself some relief. Give yourself some space. Let yourself gently return. The very act of starting is precious.
○Eastern and Western Healing Teas
Recommended beverage: Poria cocos tea. Reason for recommendation: It helps slow down the body's pace and alleviate tension and fatigue caused by narrative reconstruction while studying this lesson. Preparation: Take an appropriate amount of tea leaves, brew with warm water, and drink slowly, avoiding making it too strong. Recommended dietary therapy: Apple and oatmeal porridge. Based on the principles of being light, stable, and low-burden, it helps the body obtain sustained energy.
○ Healing Recipes
Longan and wolfberry porridge
Longan and goji berry porridge is a suitable healing recipe after this lesson. It's gentle, easy to prepare, and low-burden, providing stable energy to the body after learning about anxiety, reducing the amplification of anxiety experiences caused by hunger, fatigue, and tension. Eat slowly, observing feelings of hunger, satisfaction, breathing, and relaxation. It doesn't aim for elaborate plating, but rather serves as a gentle replenishment after anxiety practice. Let food become part of a sense of security, helping the body return from tension to stability.
Open the healing recipe
◉ Eastern Dietary Therapy · 31. Longan and Goji Berry Porridge
I. Recommended Dietary Therapy and Reasons
Recommended dishes:Longan and wolfberry porridge
Recommended reasons: Longan and goji berry porridge is a sweet, warm, and gently colored oriental nourishing porridge, suitable as a light meal to help calm emotions after a period of stress, such as during a social anxiety class. Longan brings a natural sweet aroma, while goji berries have a bright color and soft texture; when cooked with rice, they create a mild and smooth porridge base. It's suitable for when you're mentally exhausted, physically tired, or craving something sweet. Compared to high-sugar desserts, this porridge is slower and warmer, helping you slow down and reconnect with your body's natural sensations while eating.
2. Recipe and Method
Recipe (1–2 servings):
- 15g dried longan pulp
- 8g of goji berries
- 60 g japonica rice
- 750–800 ml of clean water
- A little rock sugar, optional
- Three red dates (optional)
practice:
- Rinse the dried longan pulp quickly and wash the goji berries gently with clean water.
- Rinse the rice thoroughly. If using red dates, remove the pits.
- Add rice, red dates, and water to a pot and bring to a boil over high heat.
- Simmer over low heat for 25–30 minutes until the rice is soft and tender.
- Add the longan pulp and continue to simmer over low heat for 8–10 minutes.
- Finally, add goji berries to prevent the color and taste from becoming bland due to prolonged cooking.
- Add a small amount of rock sugar as needed, simmer for 2 minutes, and it's ready to eat.
3. Small rituals for body and mind
When adding goji berries, observe the small red dots spreading in the porridge, focusing your attention on the gentle color.
As the sweet aroma of longan rises, slow your breathing and feel your body calm down from its rapid pace. Remind yourself: I can take care of this moment first.
When you take the first bite, feel the warmth, sweetness, and softness of the rice porridge to give your body a sense of security.
4. Dietary Therapy Experience Record
- Record the time of consumption: afternoon, evening, or recovery after social activities.
- Observe whether there are any changes in mood stability, body warmth, stomach comfort, and sleepiness within 30–60 minutes after consumption.
- If you eat it when you crave sweets after feeling anxious, you can keep track of whether it helps you reduce urge to eat.
V. Instructional Videos (approximately 3–5 minutes)
Video Title:Longan and Goji Berry Porridge: A sweet and nourishing oriental porridge
6. Precautions
- Both longan and goji berries have a natural sweetness, so blood sugar managers should reduce their consumption.
- Those who experience significant internal heat, dry mouth and sore throat, or a feeling of heat before bed should not consume too much of this.
- Goji berries should not be cooked at high temperatures for a long time; add them at the very end.
- When eating in the evening, portion sizes should be controlled to avoid overeating.
- Those with special physical conditions or who are currently taking medication should consume this product with caution, depending on their individual circumstances.
hint:This recipe is for daily physical and mental well-being and is not a substitute for any medical diagnosis or treatment. If you have diabetes, sleep disorders, chronic diseases, or special nutritional restrictions, please prioritize following the advice of your healthcare provider and nutritionist.
○Mandala Healing
When you have a strong sense of control, letting go can be frightening. When looking at a mandala, pay attention to the regular patterns and also the blank spaces you can't change. Life is like that too; some things can be planned, others can only be experienced. When your gaze returns to the center, remind yourself: I can do my best, and I can also allow things to unfold slowly. At the end, write down one small thing you can control today, and one thing you're willing to temporarily entrust to time. Take it slow. Take it slow. Take it slow. Take it slow.
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○ Calligraphy and engraving therapy practice
This lesson's writing practice follows the principles of "slow, steady, and clear," guiding your attention back from worry to your hand, pen, and paper. Writing words: Rewrite the name. Before writing, adjust your posture, pause for a moment before writing, and confirm that your breathing and shoulders are relaxed. If reconstructing the narrative makes you anxious, treat each stroke as an opportunity to regain your footing. Tip: Write less, write slowly, write steadily.
○ Art Therapy Guidance
Objective: To externalize "narrative reconstruction" into images, helping oneself to see it, rather than being surrounded by it. Steps: 1. Draw a shape representing current anxiety in the center of a piece of paper. 2. Mark the trigger point with a color. 3. Draw a fact area next to it and write down verifiable information. 4. Draw a calming action, such as breathing, pausing, asking for help, or drinking water. 5. After completion, write a sentence: I can see it, and I can respond to it slowly.
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○ Diary Healing Suggestions
① What is my new understanding of "narrative reconstruction" today? ② In which situations did it most frequently occur over the past week? ③ What impact did it have on sleep, attention, productivity, and interpersonal relationships? Rate it from 0 to 10. ④ Write down the worst, most likely, and best possible outcomes. ⑤ Choose a minimum feasible action: drink water, take a walk, breathe, contact a supporter, or take a five-minute break. ⑥ How will I remind myself to continue practicing tomorrow?
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When you are willing to see the “narrative reconstruction” clearly, instead of continuing to endure it alone, anxiety begins to transform from a fog into a signal that can be taken care of.